Becoming a mother or new parent is usually celebrated as one of life’s most joyous occasions, but sometimes, there are underlying feelings of sadness after giving birth that can leave a woman feeling isolated and alone, despite the endless stream of visitors clamouring to meet the new baby.
It’s totally normal to feel a little up and down in the days and weeks after your baby is born, and even to be tearful or anxious. After all, the transition from pregnancy to parenthood is rarely plain sailing. It’s a time of huge adjustment, and to top it off, there’s often not very much sleep going on.
But sometimes, normal feelings of postpartum sadness, overwhelm or irritability can last more than a few weeks, and can become so intense that life feels difficult to navigate. For some women, these symptoms can indicate the onset of Postpartum Depression, Postpartum Anxiety, Postpartum OCD or even Postpartum Psychosis.
At Grow Wild, we know it’s important to acknowledge all the trials and tribulations of becoming a mother, as well as the good bits. (And there are loads of good bits, we promise!)
What is postpartum depression?
Postpartum Depression is more than just feeling sad or emotional in the weeks after giving birth. It usually starts within the first few weeks postpartum, but it can take hold anytime in the first year of your baby’s life. Unlike the ‘baby blues,’ the effects of Postpartum Depression are more severe and longer lasting, and usually require treatment.
Postpartum Depression is caused by a complex interplay of hormonal changes, psychological adjustments and external stressors that can significantly impact a woman’s mental well-being.
Recognising the symptoms of Postpartum Depression:
The symptoms of postpartum depression can vary widely from person to person, making it challenging to diagnose. They might include:
- Persistent Sadness — Overwhelming feelings of sadness, emptiness, or hopelessness that last for extended periods of time.
- Loss of Interest — A sudden disinterest or lack of pleasure in activities that used to bring joy.
- Fatigue and Changes to Sleep Patterns — Extreme fatigue or insomnia, beyond what is considered ‘normal’ for new parents.
- Appetite Changes — Drastic changes in appetite, leading to either overeating or loss of appetite. This might also lead to sudden weight changes.
- Irritability and Anger — Unexplained irritability, anger, or feelings of resentment, often directed towards the baby or partner.
- Difficulty Bonding — Struggling to form a strong emotional connection with the baby. (It’s important to remember that bonding isn’t always instantaneous, and can take a little time. But if you’re struggling to connect with your baby weeks or months after giving birth, there might be more at play.)
- Intrusive Thoughts — Disturbing thoughts, fears, or worries about harming oneself or the baby. This can also be a symptom of Postpartum Anxiety or Postpartum OCD, which we’ll talk you through later.
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Physical Ailments — Unexplained physical ailments such as headaches or stomach aches.
What causes Postpartum Depression?
Postpartum Depression is a complex condition with multifaceted causes, including:
- Hormonal Changes — The dramatic drop in oestrogen and progesterone levels after childbirth can affect mood regulation, which is why most new mothers experience some level of emotional instability in the first few weeks postpartum.
- Biological Factors — Genetics and a personal or family history of depression can increase the risk of suffering with both perinatal and postnatal depression.
- Psychological Factors — Personal vulnerabilities, unresolved trauma, and a lack of social support can contribute to feelings of sadness and overwhelm after birth.
- Physical Changes — The physical toll of childbirth and sleep deprivation can exacerbate feelings of fatigue and emotional distress.
- Lifestyle Changes — The demands of motherhood, coupled with societal pressures and changes in routine, can be overwhelming.
What is Postpartum Anxiety?
Many new parents experience anxiety that goes beyond the usual nerves about caring for a new baby. Excessive and continuous worrying, hypervigilance and extreme anxiety are just as common as symptoms of Postnatal Depression, and can happen at the same time.
Recognising the symptoms of Postpartum Anxiety:
The symptoms of anxiety during pregnancy or postpartum might include:
- Constant worry — you might worry about things beyond your control and find the worry overwhelming.
- Feeling that something bad is going to happen — you might feel this way without explanation or cause.
- Racing thoughts
- Disturbances of sleep and appetite — anxiety can make it difficult to eat, or sleep.
- Inability to sit still
- Physical symptoms like dizziness, hot flashes, and nausea
- Panic attacks
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Postpartum OCD, including compulsions, rituals and intrusive thoughts is also a form of postpartum anxiety.
What is Postpartum OCD?
It’s estimated that as many as 3-5% of new mothers, and some new fathers, will experience the repetitive, intrusive images and thoughts that come with Postpartum OCD.
There’s a lot of overlap between Postpartum Depression, Postpartum Anxiety and Postpartum OCD — these things like to come in threes, after all. You might experience some symptoms of each of these conditions simultaneously, which might lead to a diagnosis of each illness, or of just one.
Recognising the symptoms of Postpartum OCD:
Symptoms of Postpartum OCD might include:
- Persistent and repetitive intrusive thoughts, often related to the baby. These thoughts can sometimes be very dark, and can often involve the baby coming to some harm.
- Compulsions and rituals — You might do certain things over and over to reduce fear, or because you find it impossible not to. This could include needing to clean constantly, checking the same thing many times, counting or reordering something, or constantly taking the baby’s temperature.
- Hypervigilance — you might feel on edge about everything, and worried about anything that could harm your baby, even when the scenario is very unlikely.
- Fear of being left alone — you might feel incapable of caring for your baby, and fear being by yourself.
What is Postpartum Psychosis?
Postpartum Psychosis is a serious mental illness and should be treated as a medical emergency. The condition can worsen rapidly, and can risk the safety of both mother and baby.
The symptoms of Postpartum Psychosis can have some overlap with the postpartum conditions mentioned above, but they are more severe, and oftentimes more dangerous. Because of the nature of this illness, many people may not realise that they’re ill. Your partner, family or friends may spot the signs and have to take action.
Recognising the symptoms of Postpartum Psychosis:
Symptoms usually appear within the first few days of giving birth, and can include:
- Depression – being withdrawn or tearful, lacking energy, having a loss of appetite, anxiety, agitation or trouble sleeping. But unlike Postpartum Depression, Postpartum Psychosis will be accompanied by some or all of the following symptoms also:
- Hallucinations - hearing, seeing, smelling or feeling things that are not there.
- Delusions – thoughts or beliefs that are unlikely to be true. This goes beyond hypervigilance or anxiety.
- Mania – talking and thinking too much or too quickly, and being restless.
- Rapidly changing moods — these moods will be extreme highs and lows, rather than the typical emotional ups and downs most people experience after having a baby.
- Loss of inhibitions
- Feeling suspicious or fearful
- Feeling very confused
- Behaving in a way that's completely out of character
Who is most at risk of Postpartum Mental Health Issues?
Each of the conditions explored above comes with its own set of risk factors and causes, but the truth is, anyone can experience any or all of them. Known risk factors for poor mental health during pregnancy or after giving birth include previous history of depression, anxiety or OCD, as well as genetic factors. Those who have suffered with Postpartum Psychosis in previous pregnancies are very likely to suffer with the same illness again, but forewarned is forearmed and your care team should be able to put strategies in place if you are at particular risk of any perinatal or postpartum complications.
Traumatic births, in which women feel they have not been listened to or validated, can also play a part in the way we feel afterwards, and can manifest as PTSD, as well as in symptoms of Postpartum Depression or Anxiety. It can help to seek counselling from a professional with expertise in postnatal mental health, if this is the case.
While we’ve spoken a lot about postpartum mood fluctuations, the symptoms of depression, anxiety and OCD can begin even before your baby arrives. This is called perinatal mental health. Taking care of yourself while pregnant and during the postnatal period is important — there might be 101 things to do, and maybe older children to care for as well as your new baby, but remember, you deserve to be happy and healthy.
Postnatal Depression in Men
While postnatal depression is commonly associated with mothers, it's worth noting that fathers can also experience similar emotional and psychological challenges during this period of change, especially if there were any complications or traumatic experiences during pregnancy and birth.
Symptoms of postnatal mental health issues can manifest a little differently in men, and might look more like hostility, indifference and withdrawal. Understandably, this can have an impact on the relationship, as well as on the mental health of other members of the family.
If you recognise any of the symptoms of postnatal, or paternal, depression in your partner, we’d recommend contacting PANDAS Dads to access support.
Neurodivergence in Pregnancy and Postnatally
While there is a wide spectrum of neurodiversity, encompassing autism, ADHD and sensory processing disorders, having a brain that works differently to the average, or ‘neurotypical’ brain, can bring added complications to pregnancy and the postpartum period.
Depending on the ways in which neurodivergence manifests, some people might find the challenges of pregnancy, birth and the postpartum stage more difficult due to factors like sensory overload, emotional overwhelm, struggles in adjusting to changes in the environment, and adapting to big life changes.
For someone who already struggles to cope with sensory overload, adding a crying baby and lack of sleep to the mix is bound to make things more difficult. Knowing yourself and your predispositions before your baby is born, as well as communicating these concerns with your healthcare providers and support network, will help you to be best equipped to handle the rollercoaster of new parenthood.
Eating Disorders and Pregnancy
For women who have suffered with body image issues, body dysmorphia or eating disorders either prior to, or during, pregnancy, the physical changes caused by pregnancy can be especially taxing. This is something you can chat with your health visitor or midwife about, and you can contact BEAT for specialist support in this area.
Seeking support for Postnatal Mental Health Issues:
As new parents, there’s always plenty to do, (have you seen how many nappies babies get through in a day!?) especially if you’ve got toddlers or older children already. It’s so easy to let yourself and your own issues fall by the wayside, particularly when Postpartum Depression, Anxiety of OCD has crept up on you. You might be so focused on just getting through the day in one piece, or going through the motions, that you miss the signs and symptoms of these illnesses, or put them down to ‘a bad night’s sleep’ or an argument with your partner.
Additionally, each of these conditions is made more complex by the feelings of guilt, inadequacy and shame that are likely to accompany them. After all, this is supposed to be the happiest time of your life, isn’t it? Well, not necessarily! At Grow Wild, we want to talk about the complex range of emotions and experiences that come with pregnancy, childbirth and parenthood, and say goodbye to those feelings of guilt that might exacerbate postnatal mental health issues, and could prevent you reaching out for help.
So, what can you do if you’re experiencing any of the symptoms of Postnatal Depression, Anxiety or OCD? Speaking to your Health Visitor or GP should be your first step in the process of recovery. They should be able to help with a bespoke care plan to get you feeling better. This might include medication, counselling, familial support and community support.
It’s important to remember you are never alone, even when it feels that way.
- Talk to a health professional e.g. your Health Visitor or GP.
- You can also contact PANDAS foundation, who provide help and support to parents affected by perinatal and postnatal mental illness. They have various methods of support, from phone, email, local support groups and a Whats App helpline (07903 508334).
We think PANDAS do such valuable work, that we’ve committed to splitting 2% of all Grow Wild sales between PANDAS and Refuge, a charity for women and children experiencing domestic abuse.
- To get in touch with Samaritans for free, 24/7 support call 116 123, or email jo@samaritans.org
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Learning resources:
- https://maternalmentalhealthalliance.org/
- https://www.tommys.org/ (specialising in support after baby loss)
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https://www.mind.org.uk/
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In an emergency situation call 999 or go to A&E
Some final thoughts on maternal mental health and wellbeing:
We believe maternal mental health is vital. It’s tough work being a parent, and especially being a mother. As mums, we often suffer the burden of the mental load, we lack sleep, some of us breastfeed, we contend with decisions around returning to the workplace, or not returning to the workplace. We struggle to find the time to engage in hobbies we used to enjoy, or to exercise in the ways that we used to. We battle with guilt, anxiety and feelings of inadequacy when we want time to ourselves, or with our friends. We feel bad for craving time without the baby.
But, taking care of ourselves needs to be a priority – after all, if we are not mentally well, how can we care for the people around us? So, if you find yourself experiencing any of the symptoms of postnatal mental illness described above, seek support as soon as you can.
In the meantime, we’ve got some pretty good guides on how to re-engage with hobbies and activities, get out into nature, and even go camping with your toddler, baby or newborn, which might help alleviate some of your anxieties around becoming a parent – life might change, but you are still you - and, with support, you will find yourself again.
